The Misery of Love

Maud Gonne

Why should I blame her that she filled my days with misery…                                                Why, what could she have done, being what she is?                                                                          Was there another Troy for her to burn?                                                                                             No Second Troy by William Butler Yeats

Love can be thrilling, can’t it? It can make your heart sing; bring a smile to your lips unbidden. When you’re truly in love, nothing else really matters. Except when your love is unrequited, then everything else matters. Yeats wrote No Second Troy about Maud Gonne, who was considered a great beauty and firebrand in revolutionary Ireland around 1916. She spurned his marriage proposals several times, before she finally married another suitor. She remained his muse though.

Certainly, I have felt that misery, the ruinous echo of love vibrating within my own cavernous heart with no answering call to soothe the aching. Back in my younger days, perhaps it was puppy love, but it felt real enough to me. I’d pass a note or leave a message to call me back and then anxiously await a reply. Sometimes waiting sheepishly for days because there never was an answer.

Over the years, I’ve learned love can wound and hurt as much as it can bind and make whole. I’ve been divorced now. I’m not so innocent as I once was, not innocent at all really. Once, I would have bared my heart in a note, now I’m guarded. A woman friend admitted she was afraid she couldn’t love again. She had been through too much and didn’t know if she could open herself up like that once more. She asked, Do you think you can love again, James? And I didn’t have an answer, but I did have a hope I could rebuild Troy.

#wby #yeats #williambutleryeats #maudgonne #nosecondtroy #lastfirstkiss #onlinedating #boomergeneration

5 thoughts on “The Misery of Love

  1. I’ve been fortunate to have had two long term relationships post-marriage and the “love” thing definitely didn’t come up but it was never an issue. I think it’s different in your 50s vs 20s. I loved Twinkie’s back then too but can’t stand them now.

    My dad (divorced and dating in his 50s when I was a young adult) once said to me, “when you are young and fall in love and get married it’s all love and roses and happily ever after with just the two of you. After a divorce, you’re in bed, she’s in bed, with your accountant, her accountant, your lawyer and hers too. Gets crowded.”

    Truer words never spoken on the complications of post-marriage dating.


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